side effects

i woke up looking around....went from smiling to frowning...you weren't there....reminiscing of the mornings in which i'd just stare at you....so beautiful......kiss your lips while you slept......now i only see you in my dreams.....we are always so happy in my dreams.....we still........but each day i wake up and reality sets in....we still, followed by no more....hopeful that something like forever is in store....chasing emotion over truth, we...be no more....clouded by all the love i have for you...still.....each thought of you used to make me live, now it kills...kills me.....I surrender my Love in hopes that it will come back....because nothing else fits in my heart, where you used to be at.....where you used to be home.....where you used to be safe...safe with me.......and when you were safe with me, i was......i was safe with you.........but now im broken yet again......i loved you so hard that im drained and empty....and any attempt i make........i fuck it up before it can even happen....sad thing is though i may act discouraged...i truly am not....because those attempts are not you....and my self will not allow me to fool it....my heart although it hurts and yearns for you will no longer allow you to run it...run it down....i stand emotionally drained....a few steps short of sane.............in hopes of forgetting your name.......thoughts of you from i refrain.....truth is what i refrain and hope is still in reverse.....when i'm asked who I love, want, need.........your name comes out first.
_Niquey
-just something I typed off the top of my head.........it may be fiction or non-fiction.....but that shouldn't be any of your business either way....just enjoy the read...til next time.